Don't Judge by Appearances

Rapunzel Wizard

Don't judge by appearances, when you look at me,
I might be a hairy man,
a freaky and a scary man,
a lairy and contrairy man,
but I'm not a vegetarian,
macrobiotic fruitarian,
or wind-fall, raw food, fresh fruit, vegan man.
'Cos I eat meat!

I try not to get too rude
when everyone assumes I eat, hippy food.
I don't scoff the Tofu,
and Polenta I don't miss.
And the only pulses I like,
are the ones in me wrists.

I might have a head load of dreadlocks,
dippy ideas and hippy ideals,
dig things and have tongue piercing,
but if it don't run fast enough
I say, Nab it, and nosh it!

Oi! Oi! Oi!
I eat Saveloy
and poached venison
with a menace man,
but Quorn, Quorn,
it's veggie food porn
and lentils, lentils
drive me chicken oriental.

So if you see me on the streets
hungry as hell, and lets face it
poetry doesn't pay too well,
please feed me anything tasty,
just as long as its not meat free.
'Cos you know the score, I'm a CARNIVORE!